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When he is advised in regard to certain things with which he disobeys Allaah, he says: “at-Taqwaa is here in my Chest” – Rebuttal by Shaykh ibn Uthaymeen

Advising the one who says “Taqwa is here” and he continues to Sin

A Doubt and its Rebuttle

Question 15: What lead to this question is that nowadays there is a group of people when they are called to worship Allaah they say: “Allaah is the Rabb of the hearts.” We would like also that you comment on this response?

The Answer: We say that Allaah is indeed the Rabb of the hearts as well as the tongues. He is not the Rabb of the hearts only; and if the hearts become good then the limbs become good, because the Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم says:

Verily, there is a piece of flesh in the body, if it becomes good [reformed], the whole of the body becomes good but if it gets spoilt the whole body gets spoilt and that is the heart. [29]

This Hadeeth renders the futile and false the claim by some, who when you advise him in regard to certain things with which he disobeys Allaah, he says: “at-Taqwaa [30] is right here,” and he points towards his chest.[31]

His is a word of truth intended to imply something futile. In fact a word may be true in its general sense, but the speaker intends to imply by it a futile meaning. Indeed think of the Saying of Allaah, The Most High, concerning the Mushriks:

The Mushriks will say: “If Allaah had willed, we would have not committed Shirk, nor would our fathers, and we would not have forbidden anything [against His Will]! [Qur’aan, soorat al-An’aam (6): 148].

So, they said: “If Allaah had willed, we would have not committed Shirk,” and they were truthful in that which they said. Because if Allaah had willed, they would have not committed Shirk. They, however, did not intend the truth by using this word. Rather, they wanted to justify their staying on their Shirk and the lifting of punishment from upon them. This is why Allaah, The Most High, Said:

Likewise belied those who were before them, [they argued falsely with Allaah’s Messengers], till they tasted of Our Wrath. [Qur’aan, soorat al-An’aam (6): 148].

So, of no avail to them was the use of al-Qadar [32] [Allaah’s Pre-decree] as a plea when they intended it to be a justification for continuing on their Shirk, and an excuse for lifting the blame and punishment from upon themselves. [33]

The actual fact, however, is exactly as they have put it: “If Allaah had not willed, they would not have committed Shirk,” as Allaah, The Most High, said to His Messenger:

Follow what has been inspired to you [O Muhammad صلى الله عليه و سلم] from your Rabb, Laa Ilaaha Illaa Huwa [none has the right to be worshipped but He] and turn aside from the Mushriks. Had Allaah willed, they would have not committed Shirk. [Qur’aan, soorat al-An’aam (6): 106-107].

There is, however, a difference between the two cases. In the latter case, Allaah Said to His Prophet (what means): “Had Allaah willed, they would have not committed Shirk,” in order to clarify that their Shirk occurs by His Will, and that He, The One free of all imperfections, The Most High, has a Wisdom as to the committing of Shirk by them; and in order to comfort His Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) that this action of theirs (Shirk) takes place by His, The Exalted and Most High’s, Will.

Therefore, the important thing is that the person who says when you give him advice: “at-Taqwaa is here [i.e. in his heart],” has said a true word indeed. However, he intended by it something futile and false, because the one who said: “at- Taqwaa is here…” is the Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم, the same one who also said:

“Verily, there is a piece of flesh in the body, if it becomes good [reformed], the whole of the body becomes good…”

If there is Taqwaa in the heart, then it is imperative that there is Taqwaa in the limbs, and the outward actions are a sign of the inward actions of the heart.


[29] An agreed upon hadeeth. See Saheeh al-Bukhaaree, vol.1, no. 49.
[30] The true meaning of at-Taqwaa is fearing Allaah and hoping for His Mercy by executing His Commands and staying away from all that He has forbidden.
[31] The Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) in the authentic hadeeth reported by Muslim said: “A Muslim is the brother of a Muslim. He neither oppresses him nor humiliates him nor looks down upon him. The Taqwaa is here [and while saying so] he pointed towards his chest thrice.” See Saheeh Muslim, vol. 4, no.6219.
[32] Al-Qadar: Allaah’s Pre-ordainment of the creation in accordance with His Foreknowledge, and in accordance with His Wisdom.
[33] In his book Sharh al-Usool ath-Thalaathah, Shaykh Muhammd Bin ‘Uthaymeen, may Allaah’s Mercy be upon him, said: “If there had been any excuse for them in al-Qadar then Allaah would not have sent down His Punishment upon them.” See Sharh al-Usool ath-Thalaathah [English Translation by brother Daawood Burbank], p.186, Daar al- Hidaayah Publishing, Birmingham, U.K.

Posted from eBook – Understanding Worship – Fiqh ul-‘Ibadah – QA Format – Ibn Uthaymeen – Dr Saleh as Saleh

Correct methodology with regard to advising the Rulers – Shaykh Saalih al-Fawzaan

Beneficial Answers to Questions on Innovated Methodologies by Shaykh Saalih al-Fawzaan Hafithahullaah. (Beneficial footnotes by Jamaal bin Fareehan Al-Harithee). Pg. 51-55

Question :

What is the correct methodology for advising, particularly with regard to advising the rulers? Is it by publicising their evil actions from their evil actions from the mimbars or by advising them in private? I would like to know what the correct methodology is concerning this matter?


Infallibility is not for anyone except Allaah’s Messenger . Rulers are humans and they make errors. So no doubt they have errors and mistakes, as they are not infallible. But do not make their errors a reason for you to publicise them and remove yourself from obeying them, even if they may be oppressive and unjust ,and even if they may be sinful, so long as they do not commit clear disbelief. This is that the Prophet commanded us.

This is the Creed of Ahlus-Sunnah wal-Jamaa’ah with respect to the Muslim ruler. The author of Al-‘Aqeedah at-Tahaawiyyah said:“And we do not hold it permissible to rebel against our Imaams and our leaders, even if they may be oppressive. Nor do we supplicate against them or remove ourselves from obedience to them. And we hold that obeying them is part of obeying Allaah and hence an obligation so long as they do not order (us) commit sins. We supplicate to Allaah for them that He grant them rectification and pardon.”This is the same belief that the callers to truth are upon to this very day. These same words and those that bear a similar meaning to it were constantly repeated by our teacher, Shaykh ‘Abdul-‘Azeez bin ‘Abdillaah bin Baaz, may Allaah have mercy on him, in his classes and lectures.

He is referring to the hadeeth of ‘Ubaadah bin as-Saamit (radhiyAllaahu anh) in which he said:“The Prophet summoned us and so we gave him the oath of allegiance that we would hear and obey (the leader) in matters that we liked and matters that we disliked and in things that were hard upon us and things that were easy upon us, and (that we would give him) preference over ourselves. And that we would not oppose the authority of the leader unless we notice him having open disbelief, for which you would have a clear proof from Allaah against him.”(Fath-ul-Baaree: 13/5)
Ahmad added to this in his narration:

“And if you believe that you have some justification in the matter (i.e. of rebelling), do no act upon this suspicion. Rather, just hear and obey until it reaches you, without removing yourself from the obedience.”

And there is further addition in the report of Ibn Hibbaan and Ahmad:

“…even if they take your wealth and beat your back.”

(Fath-ul-Baaree: 13/8)

And if they have sins and commit oppression and injustice, then indeed having patience while obeying them keeps the unity, maintains unification of the Muslims, and protects the lands of the Muslims. Furthermore, there are great evils that result from in opposing them and seceding from them, which are greater than the evils that (may) come from them. So there will occur greater evil –

The Shaykh, may Allaah preserve him, is referring to the hadeeth of the Ibn ‘Abbaas (radhiyAllaahu anh) in which he narrated that the Prophet said:“Whoever sees in his leader something that he dislikes, then let him be patient with it, for indeed, whoever splits away from the Jamaa’ah (unified group) even an inch, and then dies, he does not die except the death of some in the Days of Ignorance.”(Reported by Al-Bukhaaree (7054); See Fath-ul-Baaree (13/5))And he is also referring to the hadeeth of Anas bin Maalik (radhiyAllaahu anh) in which the Prophet said:“You will indeed see things after me that you will disapprove of.”
So they said:“What do you order us to do with them, O Messenger of Allaah?”

He replied:“Give them (i.e. the leaders) their rights and ask Allaah for your rights.”

(Reported by Al-Bukhaaree (7052); See Fath-ul-Baaree (13/5) and Sunan At-Tirmidhee (2190))


Such as the rallies and demonstrations that have appeared in some of the neighbouring countries. These demonstrations are from the practices of the disbelievers , and not from the Muslims. And it is not part of the Religion in any way. They result in the shedding of blood, the destruction of property, and that misery gained over the Sunnah and its adherents. So won’t the callers to political instigation reflect on these consequences?
– than that which comes from them in the first place, so long as this evil (on their part) is less than disbelief (Kufr) and polytheism (Shirk). We are not saying that one should remain silent at the errors that come out from the rulers. No, rather they should be corrected. But they must be corrected in a pure way, by advising them privately, and writing to them in private. By writing to them, we don’t mean that which is written down, passed through the hands of a group of individuals and then spread amongst the people. This is not permissible. Rather, a confidential letter, should be written, in which there is advice –

(This is the methodology of the Salaf with regard to advising the rulers – that it be private and concealed so that there is no room for self-amazement (riyaa) to enter. And in these circumstances, it is much more likely that they (i.e. the leaders) will accept the advice and that Allaah will accept the (good) deed. We will mention some of the texts and narrations regarding this later.)
,and handed over to the ruler or read to him orally. As for a letter that is written, then photocopied, then distributed to the people, then this act is not permissible because it is publicising (his errors), and it is just like speaking against him from the mimbar. In fact, it is worse because it is possible for a person to forget a speech, but as for a written letter, it remains and passes through hands. So this is not from the truth. The Prophet said:

“The Religion is sincerity (advice). The Religion is sincerity (advice). The Religion is sincerity (advice).”

We said:

“To who, O Messenger of Allah?”

He said:

“To Allaah, His Book, His Messenger, the leaders of the Muslims and their common folk.”

(Reported by Muslim (55))

And in the hadeeth, it states:
“Verily Allaah is pleased with three things for you and He is displeased with three things for you. He is pleased that you (1) worship Him and not associate anything (in worship) with Him; and that (2) you hold tight onto the Rope of Allaah, all of you together, and not be divided, and that (3) you mutually advise he whom Allaah gives authority of your affairs.”

(Saheeh: An authentic hadeeth reported by Ahmad (2/367) and Maalik in Al-Muwatta (2/756) with the verification of ‘Abdul-Baaqee.)

The people most fitting and qualified to advise the rulers are the scholars, the members of legal and consultative decisions, and those responsible for making decisions and problem-solving. Allaah says:

When there comes to them some matter touching (public) safety or fear, they make it known (among the people). But if Only they had referred it to the Messenger or to those charged with authority amongst them, the proper investigators would have understood it from them (directly).And had it not been for the Grace and Mercy of Allaâh upon you, You would have followed Shaitân (Satan), except for a few (from you).
(Surah an-Nisaa: 83)

So not everybody is fit to do this. And disseminating and publicising their errors is not from advising at all. Rather, it is from spreading evil and wickedness amongst those who believe. And it is not from the methodology of the Salaf As-Saalih, even if the intention of the one who does it may be good and pure, such as for the sake of forbidding an evil, according to his view. However, what he did is a greater evil than that which he is forbidding. Therefore, forbidding an evil may be evil in itself if it is done in a way other than what Allaah and His Messenger have legislated.

Shaykh-ul-Islaam Ibn Taymiyyah (rahimahullaah) said:“Gentleness is a way towards commanding good and forbidding evil. This is why it is said: “Let your commanding of good be good, and your forbidding of evil not evil.”And since commanding good and forbidding evil are from the greatest of obligatory and recommended acts, the benefit derived from it must always outweigh the evil… Rather, everything that Allaah commanded us with is in fact good. Allaah has praised good and the doers of good, and He has condemned evil and the doers of evil in many places (of the Qur’aan). So in the case where commanding good and forbidding evil will only bring about greater corruption, it is something that Allaah has not commanded, even if it results in a person abandoning an obligation and committing a prohibition, since the believer is only required to fear Allaah with regard to Allaah’s servants, and it is not upon him to guide.”(Al-Amr bil-Ma’roof wan-Nahee ‘anil-Munkar (pg. 19)This is since this person has not followed the legislated way of the Prophet, which he described when he said:“Whoever amongst you sees an evil, then let him change it with his hand. But if he is not able to, then with his tongue. And if he is not able to, then with his heart, and this is the weakest of Faith.”
(Reported by Muslim (49))

So Allaah’s Messenger divided people into three categories: Amongst them is he who able is able to terminate the evil with his hand, and he is the one in authority, such as the ruler and those entrusted with authority, such as committees, governors and leaders. The second type is the scholar who because he has no authority, forbids (evil) by explaining and advising with wisdom and fair admonition, and by advising those in authority in a wise manner. The third category consists of those who have no knowledge or authority. They should forbid the evil with their hearts, by hating it and by hating and withdrawing away from those who do it.

Reference: Beneficial Answers to Questions on Innovated Methodologies by Shaykh Saalih al-Fawzaan Hafithahullaah. (Beneficial footnotes by Jamaal bin Fareehan Al-Harithee). Pg. 51-55

Why My Supplication is Not Answered? Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen

By the Noble Scholar, Shaykh Muhammad Ibn Saalih al-’Uthaymeen [1]
Majmoo’ul-Fataawaa war-Rasaa‘il (no. 155)

[Q]: ‘Allaah says: ‘‘And your Lord says: Call upon Me and I will, respond to your supplication.’’ [Soorah Ghaafir 40:60] So why is it that a person’s du’aa (supplication) is sometimes unanswered?’

[A]: ‘‘All praise is due to Allaah, Lord of the worlds. May the Prayers and Peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad, and upon his Family and his Companions. I ask Allaah for the ability to be correct in belief, speech and actions, for myself and for my brothers.

Allaah says:

‘‘And your Lord says: Call upon Me and I will respond to your supplication. Verily those who are too arrogant to worship Me will, enter Hell in humiliation.’’ [Soorah Ghaafir 40:60]

The questioner stated that he did indeed make du’aa (supplication) to Allaah – the Mighty and Majestic – but it was not answered by Allaah. So he is in doubt with respect to this noble aayah (verse), in which Allaah promises to answer the one who supplicates to Him, and indeed Allaah – the Most Perfect – never breaks His promise.

So the clarification of this is that there are certain conditions that need to be fulfilled in order for a supplication to be answered. These conditions are:

Firstly: Sincerity to Allaah – the Mighty and Majestic. That is to say, one must be sincere in his du’aa (supplication), so he turns to Allaah – the One free from all imperfections with an attentive heart, being truthful in his turning to Him, knowing that Allaah – the Most Perfect, the Most High – is capable of answering his du’aa (supplication) and hoping that the du’aa will be answered.

Secondly: During du’aa, the caller should feel that he is in need of Allaah – the Most Perfect, the Most High – in fact in dire need; and that only Allaah alone answers the supplication of the one in distress and the One who removes evil.

Thirdly: That the one making du’aa should refrain from haraam (unlawful) matters, as this acts as a barrier between the person and his du’aa (supplication) being answered – as has been established in the authentic hadeeth, from the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) who said: ‘‘Indeed Allaah – the Most High -is good and accepts only that which is good. Allaah has ordered the Believers to do that which He commanded the Messengers. Allaah – the Most High -has said:

‘‘O you Messengers! Eat of the good things and do righteous actions.’’ [Sooratul-Mu‘minoon 3:51 ]

And Allaah – the Most High – says:

‘‘O you who Believe! Eat of the good things wherewith We have provided you. ’’ [Sooratul-Baqarah 2:172]

Then he mentioned (the case of) a man who, having journeyed far is dishevelled and dusty and who spreads out his hands to the sky (saying): ‘O Lord! O Lord,’ whilst his food is unlawful, his drink unlawful and he is nourished unlawfully. So how can he be answered!’ [2] So the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) explained the un-likelihood that this person’s du’aa would be answered, even after fulfilling the apparent factors which aid the du’aa being answered. The apparent factors being:

[i]: Raising ones’ hands towards the sky, meaning towards Allaah – the Mighty and Majestic – since Allaah is above the heavens, above His ’Arsh (Throne). Extending the hands out towards Allaah -the Mighty and Majestic – is amongst the causes of du’aa being responded to, as is shown in the narration from the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) that he said: ‘‘Indeed your Lord is Alive, Most generous. He feels shy that when his servant raises his hands towards Him, calling upon Him, that He should return him empty, having nothing.’’[3]

[ii]: This man called upon Allaah – the Most High – using the name Rabb (Lord). Seeking tawassul (the means of nearness to Allaah) with this name is also regarded as one of the causes for du’aa to be responded to, since the Rabb is the Creator, the Owner, the Governor of all affairs – and the reigns of the Heavens and the earth are in His Hands. Due to this, you will find that most of the supplications made in the Noble Qur‘aan are by this name:

‘‘Our Lord! We have heard the call of one calling us to faith: ‘Believe you in the Lord,’ and we have believed. Our Lord! Forgive us our sins, and remit from us our evil deeds, and take to Yourself our souls in the company of the righteous. Our Lord! Grant us what You did promise unto us through Your Messengers, and do not disgrace us on the Day of judgement, for You never break Your promise. And their Lord has accepted of them, and answered them: Never will I suffer to be lost the work of any of you, whether male or female.’’ [Soorah Aal-‘lmraan 3:193-195]

So tawassul (seeking the means of nearness to Allaah) by this name is one of the causes for the du’aa to be responded to.

[iii]: This man was a traveller, and journeying is often a cause for du’aa to be responded to, because a person feels more in need of Allaah – the Mighty and Majestic – when travelling, than when a person is resident with his family. He was dusty and dishevelled, seeming very insignificant in himself, as if the most important thing to him was to implore Allaah and to call upon Him – in any condition he may be – whether dusty and dishevelled, or in ease and oppulance. Being dusty and dishevelled is also instrumental, like in the hadeeth attributed to the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) in which he said: Indeed Allaah boasts to the people of the Heaven about the people standing at ’Arafah, saying: ‘‘Look at My servants who have come to Me dusty and dishevelled.’’ [4] However, these factors did not bring about anything, because his food, his nourishment and his clothing were all haraam (unlawful). So the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) remarked: ‘‘So how can he be answered!’’

Therefore, if these conditions are not satisfied, then the question concerning the du’aa (supplication) being answered will seem distant. However, if the conditions are satisfied and the one supplicating is still not answered, then this is due to a wisdom which Allaah – the Mighty and Majestic – knows, and the one supplicating does not know what this wisdom is; and maybe that you like a thing and it is bad for you.

So when these conditions are fulfilled and the one supplicating is not answered, then either he has been protected from an evil which is greater than what he has asked for, or Allaah stores it for him until the Day of Resurrection, and he then gets a greater reward. This is so, because the one who makes du’aa – calling upon Allaah alone, fulfilling the conditions and not being answered, but rather being saved from a greater evil – is in the position of having carried out the causes yet has been prevented from being answered, and therefore has a two-fold reward. One reward for making du’aa (supplication), and another reward for bearing the trial of not being answered. So that which is greater and more complete is stored for him with Allaah – the Mighty and Majestic.

Also of importance is that the one supplicating should not express dissatisfaction if his du’aa is apparently not being answered, for this action in itself is a reason for the du’aa not being answered – as the Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said: ‘‘A servants du’aa continues to be answered as long as he does not ask for anything sinful or breaking the ties of relations, and as long as he does not become impatient.’’ It was said: How does one become impatient O Messenger of Allaah? He said: ‘‘He says: I have supplicated, I have supplicated, yet it has not been answered.’’ [5] He therefore becomes dispondant and abandons supplicating. So it is not befitting that the one supplicating should become impatient about being answered, then become disappointed and dispondant, and thereby abandon making du’aa. Rather, one should call upon Allaah, since every du’aa you make to Allaah is an act of worship, which brings you closer to Him and increases your reward.

So my brother, you should take to making du’aa (supplication) in all affairs, be it general or specific, in difficulty or in ease. And if it was that supplication was only a means of worshipping Allaah – the One free from all imperfections, the Most High – then that would be sufficient. So it is more befitting that a person strives in this – and with Allaah lies the success and the ability.’’

[1] Majmoo’ul-Fataawaa war-Rasaa‘il (no. 155)
[2] Related by Muslim (no. 1015) from Aboo Hurayrah (radiyallaahu ’anhu)
[3] Saheeh: Related by Ahmad (5/438) and Aboo Daawood (no. 1488). It was authenticated by al-Haafidh Ibn Hajar in Fathul-Baaree (11/143).
[4] Saheeh: Related by Ibn Hibbaan (no. 1006), from ’Abdullaah Ibn ’Amr (radiyallaahu ’anhu). It was authenticated by Shaykh al-Albaanee in Saheehul-Jaami’ (no. 1868).
[5] Related by al-Bukhaaree (11/140) and Muslim (no. 2735), from Aboo Hurayrah (radiyallaahu ’anhu)

Status of The Muslim Woman in the Ummah[Sheikh Ibn baaz]

Shaykh ʿAbd al-ʿAzīz ibn Bāz

The status of the Muslim woman in Islām is a very noble and lofty one, and her effect is very great in the life of every Muslim. Indeed the Muslim woman is the initial teacher in building a righteous society, providing she follows the guidance from the Book of Allāh and the Sunnah of the Messenger (ṣallallāhu ʿalayhi wa-sallam). Since adherence to the Qurʾān and the Sunnah distances every Muslim – male or female – from being misguided in any matter. The misguidance that the various nations suffer from, and their being deviated does not come about except by being far away from the path of Allāh – the Most Perfect, the Most High – and from what His Prophets and Messngers - may Allāh’s Peace and Prayers be upon them all – came with. The Prophet (ṣallallāhu ʿalayhi wa-sallam) said:

"I am leaving behind you two matters, you will not go astray as long as you cling to them both, the Book of Allāh and my Sunnah." [1]

The great importance of the Muslim woman’s role – whether as wife, sister, or daughter, and the rights that are due to her and the rights that are due from her – have been explained in the noble Qurʾān, and further detailed of this have been explained in the purified Sunnah.

The secret of her importance lies in the tremendous burden and responsibility that is placed upon her, and the difficulties she has to shoulder – responsibilities and difficilties some of which not even a man bears. This is why from the most important obligations upon a person is to show gratitude to the mother, and kindness and good companionship with her. And in this matter, she is to be given precedence over and above the father. Allāh the Exalted says:

"And We have enjoined upon man to be good and dutiful to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness upon weakness and hardship upon hardship, and his weaning is in two years. Show gratitude and thanks to Me and to your parents. Unto Me is the final destination." [Sūrah Luqmān 31:14]

Allāh the Exalted said:

"And We have enjoined upon man to be dutiful and kind to his parents. His mother bears him with hardship, and she brings him forth with hardship. And the bearing and weaning of him is thirty months." [Sūrah al-Ahqāf 41:15]

A man came to the Messenger of Allāh (ṣallallāhu ʿalayhi wa-sallam) and said: "O Messenger of Allāh! Who from amongst mankind warrants the best companionship from me?" He replied:

"Your mother."

The man asked, "Then who?" So he replied:

"Your mother."

The man then asked, "Then who?" So the Prophet replied again:

"Your mother."

Then the man asked, "Then who?" So he replied:

"Your father." [2]

So this necessitates that the mother is given three times the likes of kindness and good treatment than the father.

As regards the wife, then her status and her effect in making the soul tranquil and serene has been clearly shown in the noble āyah (statement of Allāh), in His – the Exalted – saying:

"And from His signs is this: That He created for you wives amongst yourselves, so that you may find serenity and tranquility in them. And He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in this are signs for those who reflect." [Sūrah al-Rūm 30:21]

Al-Ḥāfiẓ Ibn Kathīr (d.774H) – raḥimahullāh – said whilst explaining the terms muwaddah and raḥmah which occur in the above āyah:

"Al-muwaddah means love and affection and al-raḥmah means compassion and pity – since a man takes a woman either due to his love for her, or because of compassion and pity for her; by giving to her a child from himself…" [3]

And the unique stance that the Prophet’s (ṣallallāhu ʿalayhi wa-sallam) wife Khadījah – raḍī Allāhu ʿanhā – took, had a huge effect in calming and reassuring the Messenger of Allāh (ṣallallāhu ʿalayhi wa-sallam), when the angel Jibrīl (ʿalayhis salām) first came to the cave of Hiraa. So the Prophet (ṣallallāhu ʿalayhi wa-sallam) returned to Khadījah (raḍī Allāhu ʿanhā) with the first Revelation and with his heart beating and trembling severely, and he said to her:

"Cover me! Cover me!"

So she covered him until his fear was over, after which he told Khadījah (raḍī Allāhu ʿanhā) everything that happened and said:

"I fear that something may happen to me."

So she said to him:

"Never! By Allāh! Allāh will never disgrace you. You keep good ties with the relations, you help the poor and the destitute, you serve your guests generously and assist those who have been afflicted with calamities." [4]

And do not forget about Āʾishah (raḍī Allāhu ʿanhā) and her great effect. Since even the great Companions used to take the knowledge of Ḥadīth from her, and many of the Sahaabiyaat (female Companions) learned the various rulings pertaining to women’s issues from her.

And I have no doubt that my mother – may Allāh shower His mercy upon her – had a tremendous effect upon me, in encouraging me to study; and she assisted me in it. May Allāh greatly increase her reward and reward her with the best of rewards for what she did for me.

And there is no doubt also, that the house in which there is kindness, gentleness, love and care, along with the correct Islamic tarbiyah (education and cultivation) will greatly effect the man. So he will become – if Allāh wills – successful in his affairs and in any matter – whether it be seeking knowledge, traḍīng, earning a living, or other than this. So it is Allāh alone that I ask to grant success and to guide us all to that which He loves and is pleased with. And may the Prayers and Peace of Allāh be upon our Prophet Muḥammad and upon his Family, his Companions and his followers.

[1] Ḥasan: Related by Mālik in al-Muwaṭṭaa (2/899) and al-Ḥākim (1/93), from Ibn ʿAbbās (raḍī Allāhu ʿʿʿanhu). It was authenticated by Shaykh al-Albānī in al-Ṣaḥihah (no. 1871).

[2] Related by al-Bukhārī (no. 5971) and Muslim (7/2), from Abū Hurayrah (raḍī Allāhu ʿʿʿanhu).

[3] Tafsīr Qurʾānil A’dtheem (3/439) of al-Ḥāfiẓ Ibn Kathīr.

[4] Related by al-Bukhārī (1/22) and Muslim (1/139), from the lengthy narration of Āʾishah (raḍī Allāhu ʿanhā).

Choosing a Good Spouse in Marriage – ‘Abdus-Salaam bin ‘Abdillaah As-Sulaymaan

AUTHOR: ‘Abdus-Salaam bin ‘Abdillaah As-Sulaymaan
SOURCE: Tarbiyat-ul-Awlaad fee Daw’-il-Kitaabi was-Sunnah (pg. 18-22)

[From the book: “Raising Children in Light of the Qur’aan and Sunnah” by ‘Abdus-Salaam As-Sulaymaan. The book was introduced and commended by Shaikh Saalih Al-Fawzaan.]

Choosing the Mother (i.e. one’s wife):

If someone wishes to produce ripe fruits, he will indeed search for the land that is most fertile. One of the great aspects of wisdom behind getting married is to produce righteous offspring that will worship Allaah and serve as a provision for their parents. The Prophet said: “Marry women that are loving and fertile for indeed I will outnumber the nations through you.” [Reported by Abu Dawood] [1]

Furthermore, the Prophet clarified the people’s standards when seeking a partner for marriage, saying: “A woman is married for four (reasons): Her wealth, her lineage, her beauty and her religion. So choose the woman with (good) religious qualities, may your hand be covered in dust.”[2]

Allaah says: “Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient and guard in the husband’s absence what Allaah orders them to guard.” [Surah An-Nisaa: 34]

The devoutly obedient (Qaanitaat) here refers to those women obey their husbands – by guarding their honor, wealth and lives in their absence.

The Prophet warned about (marrying) a beautiful woman from a bad origin, saying: “Beware of the green manure.” The Companions asked: “What is the green manure?” He said: “A beautiful woman of bad origin (i.e. upbringing).” [Reported by Ad-Daaraqutnee] [3]

On the other hand, he praised a woman with good religious qualities, saying: “Shall I not inform you of the best treasure that a man gathers – A righteous wife.” [Reported by Al-Haakim] [4]

And he said: “Choose for your seeds (a good mother), for indeed breeding is a strategy.”[Reported by Ibn Maajah] [5]

This is from the rights that a child has over his father – that he picks a good mother for him.

A man once came to ‘Umar bin Al-Khattaab complaining about his son being undutiful to him. He had brought his son with him and began blaming him for his disobedience, so the son asked: “Doesn’t a son have a right over his father also?” ‘Umar said: “Of course.” The son said: “Then what is it?” ‘Umar replied: “That his father carefully chooses a mother for him, that he gives him a good name and that he teaches him the Qur’aan.”

At this, the son said: “My father has not done any of these things. As for my mother, she was a black slave woman that used to belong to a Zoroastrian (Majoos). He named me Ju’al and did not teach me even one letter from the Qur’aan.” ‘Umar turned to the man and said: “You came to me to complain about your son being undutiful to you, however, it is you who were undutiful to him before that!”

Abul-Aswad Ad-Du’alee once told his children: “I was good to you when you were children, when you grew up, and also before you were born.” They asked: “And how is it that you were good to us before we were born?” He said: “I chose for you a mother through whom you would not be mistreated.”

Ar-Riyaashee would recite this same theme in the following poetic verses:

“The first good thing I did for you was my choosing (for you)
an honorable woman of noble descent and clear virtue.”

The Wife Searching for a Righteous Husband:

Just as a husband should look for a righteous wife, so too should a woman look to choose a righteous husband. Abu Hurairah reported that the Messenger of Allaah said: “If someone should come to you whose religion and character you are pleased with, marry (your daughter) off to him. If you do not do so, there will be mischief in the land and widespread corruption.” [6]

Based on this, we see that the firm foundation that a potential couple should base their selection of one another should be that of: Religion and Character. This is what will bring about a correct and proper upbringing for children.

On the wedding night when the groom consummates the marriage, it is recommended for him to say:“O Allaah, I ask you for her good and the good that she was molded upon” whilst placing his hand upon her head. He should also pray two rak’aat with her. [7]


[1] Reported by Abu Dawood (2050) and An-Nasaa’ee (3227) from the narration of Ma’qal bin Yassaar and authenticated by Ibn Hibbaan (4056 and 4057). The hadeeth was also reported by Ahmad in al-Musnad (12613) and Ibn Hibbaan (4028) from the narration of Anas bin Maalik.

[2] Reported by Al-Bukhaaree (5090), Muslim (1466), Abu Dawood (2047), An-Nasaa’ee (3230) and Ahmad in al-Musnad (9521)

[3] Reported by Ad-Daaraqutnee in al-Afraad from the narration of Abu Sa’eed in marfoo’ form. Al-‘Ajaloonee mentioned it in Kashf-ul-Khafaa (1/319, no. 855). What it means is that it is disliked to marry a corrupt woman since a woman with bad roots will affect her child negatively. The basis (for the similitude) is that crops grow upon manure that is placed in a dirty area. So the outward appearance of the crops appears nice but the inner appearance of the manure is vile and rotten. The word diman is the plural of the word dimnah, and that refers to manure (i.e. fertilizer). [4] Reported by Al-Haakim in al-Mustadrak (2/363, no. 3281) from the narration of Ibn ‘Abbaas.

[5] Reported by Ibn Maajah (1968) from the narration of ‘Aa’ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, with the wording: “Choose (a good mother) for your seeds, marry the suitable ones (among women) and wed (your children) to them.” It is also reported with the wording: “And look into which source you place your child for indeed breeding is a strategy.” This hadeeth was transmitted by Al-Qadaa’ee in Musnad-ush-Shihaab (1/370, no. 638) from the narration of Ibn ‘Umar. Also see Kashf-ul-Khafaa (1/358, no. 960).

[6] Reported by At-Tirmidhee (1085) from the narration of Abu Haatim Al-Muznee, and he said: “This is a hasan ghareeb hadeeth.” Abu Haatim Al-Muznee was a Companion. No other hadeeth is known to have been reported by him on the Prophet except this hadeeth. Abu Dawood also mentioned it in al-Maraaseel (224) but according to him, Abu Haatim Al-Muznee is a Taabi’ee. The hadeeth also has a supporting witness in the hadeeth of Abu Hurairah with the wording: “If someone whose religion and character you are pleased with proposes marriage to you (i.e. your daughter), then marry (her) off to him. If you fail to do so, there will be mischief in the land and widespread corruption.” [Reported by At-Tirmidhee (1084) and Ibn Maajah (1967)]

[7] Reported by Al-Haakim in al-Mustadrak (2/202, no. 2757); ‘Abdullaah bin ‘Amr reported that Allaah’s Messenger said: “If one of you obtains a slave-girl or a wife or a riding beast, he should take hold of her forelock, supplicate for blessings and say: ‘O Allaah, I ask You for her good and the good that she was molded upon. And I seek refuge in You from her evil and the evil that she was molded upon.” Al-Haakim authenticated it and Adh-Dhahabee agreed.

Sadaqa is a Reason for the Increase in Provision and It is a Door From The Doors Of Sustenance – Shaykh Muhammad Al-Wassãbi

The eighth door of sustenance : As-Sadaqaat (non-obligatory charity) :

Charitable donations, and nafaqaath (regular spending) – you spend on yourself, on your wife, on your children, on your father and your mother, on your uncles and aunts, on your righteous neighbours, on sons and daughters, relatives, widows and orphans – this type of charity, the affair of this is great with Allaah. This is a means of accumulation of provision, a door from the doors of sustenance.

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:

“There is no day on which the people get up but two angels come down and one of them says, ‘O Allaah, give in compensation to the one who spends (in charity),’ and the other says, ‘O Allaah, destroy the one who withholds.’”

[Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1374; Muslim, 1010.]

So try and not make a day pass from you from the days of Allaah except that you stretch your hand as much as it is in your ability to do, even if it is a little.

The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said : ‘Fear Allaah even if it is with half a date.’ [Muttafaqun alai – agreed upon]

And Allaah (subhana wa ta’ala) says: ‘fa mai ya’mal misqaala zarrathin kharrai yara. Wamai ya’mal misqaala zarrathin sharrai yara’ — ‘that whoever does an atoms worth of good he will see it.

And Allaah (subhana wa ta’ala) also says, ‘Whatever you spend in the way of Allaah, He will replace it and He is the best of the Providers.’

What is the meaning of ‘He will replace it?’ i.e He will give you what is better than it. Don’t think that is the end & that it has gone from you. It will return to you with that which is better, insha-Allaah.

The Sheikh says again : Whatever you have spent, then Allaah will replace it for you and He is the Best of Providers. And he says again that : O Allaah give the person that spends a replacement that is replaced for him with good, O Lord of the worlds.

And in the hadith of Abu Huraira (radiallaahu anhu) that Msulim related that the Messenger of Allaah said : that there was people from people that were from before you a man who had a garden. And another man heard a cry from the sky, an angel from the clouds who said, ‘give water to the garden of so and so.’ So he poured into it some water into one of the irrigation holes and then the water ran into that garden. So the person who owned the garden, he had a shovel in his hand and he was fixing the water and fixing the dirt and this man said to the man who owned the garden, ‘may Allaah have mercy upon you. What is your name?’

He said: I am so and so, the son of so and so. Then he said: ‘Why do you ask?’

He said: ” I heard a voice from the clouds saying, ‘give water to the garden of so and so. May Allaah have mercy on you. What do you do with this?’

So the owner of the garden says : ‘When I plant and then I harvest, I take one-third for me and my family and I put one-third to roll it back into my garden and I give one-third in charity.

Look at this. What is required from him is only a one-10th of the farm that is if it comes from natural torrential streams and the like (without any artificial irrigation or water). And a half of the 10th if it is water with sprinklers and irrigation.

So rather than giving 1/10th or half of 1/10th, he gave 1/3rd. Meaning he put aside more for charity. So see how Allaah singled him out with rain especially for his garden. Rain specific for him over his neighbors. What did he do to deserve this? He gave sadaqa. Therefore Sadaqaa doesn’t decrease wealth.

Once we were in a certain area giving dawah and alhamdulillaah we always go out calling the people to the Book and the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allaah and remind them of Allaah and the Last Day and righteous deeds and we saw that the mountains were green and the trees were green maasha’Allaah and what a beautiful sight. And they had good agriculture. There must have been a reason because their neighbour’s lands were dusty and barren and their land was green. We saw the reason on the way. There if you walk from a distance to a distance you could have the coolness of water i.e from place to place except that we saw a water cooler.

The Sheikh said : Because of the water cooler, Allaah sent down rain because of this cooler. If they are generous people, then Allaah is more generous than them. He is generous and loves the generous people and if they are merciful, then Allaah is more merciful than them. Allaah is Merciful and He loves the merciful people.

A sadaqa that they did, Allaah did not lose it for them. On the contrary, He gave them the reward for it in this world and the Hereafter. Therefore Sadaqa is a reason for the increase in provision and it is a door from the doors of sustenance and a door from the doors of relief & distress. And also az-Zakaat, it is a door from the doors of relief & distress and all of what you have heard are doors from the doors of relief from distress –- a door of provision and a reason for provision. Even if some of the people only see the material means. As for these other legislated means then these are not in the minds of most people these days, except those on whom Allaah has mercy on. Eventhough they read the Qur’aan however, without pondering, except whom Allaah has protected from that.

From : Means of Sustenance : Shaykh Muhammad Ibn ‘Abdul-Wahhaab al-Wassaabee. 

Wrong Understandings Regarding some of the Rulings of Wudoo

1 – Some people presume that it is not allowed to perform Wudu whilst being uncovered!

The noble scholar AbdulAziz Ibn Baz ‏ رحمه اللهsaid:

‘Covering ones private parts is not a condition in the correctness of Wudu.’

[Fatawa Ibn Baz 10/101]

2 – Some people presume that if one precedes washing a limb from the left hand side before one from the right hand side then their Wudu is not correct.

Imam Nawawi ‏ رحمه اللهsaid:

‘The scholars are in consensus that preceding the right over that of the left from washing the hands and feet in Wudu is a Sunnah, if it is opposed in washing [left before the right] then a virtue is missed out on but the Wudu is correct.’

[Sharh Saheeh Muslim 3/160]

3 – Many people raise their finger whilst reciting the testification of Islaam after Wudu.

‘Allaama Ibn Uthaymeen ‏ رحمه اللهsaid:

‘I do not know of a foundation for this action.’

[Fatawa noor ala Darb 8/117]

4 – Some people think that if you touched some impurity that you have to repeat your Wudu from the beginning!

‘Allaama Ibn Uthaymeen ‏ رحمه اللهsaid:

‘Stepping upon impurities while it is moist does not invalidate the Wudu, however, it is upon the person to purify that which it is obligatory to purify; meaning you only have to purify the place that was affected by the impurity.’

[Fatawa Ibn Uthaymeen 52/119]

5 – Many people find it difficult in themselves to wipe over socks which have holes in them.

‘Allaama Ibn Uthaymeen ‏ رحمه اللهsaid:

‘It is permissible to wipe over socks which have holes in them and it is permissible to wipe over thin Khuff (leather socks), because many of the Companions were poor, and generally the poor have Khuff which have holes in them.

[Fatawa Ibn Uthaymeen 11/116]

6 – Some people wipe over socks which have pictures on them of those things which posses a soul.

‘Allaama Ibn Uthaymeen ‏ رحمه اللهsaid:

‘It is not permissible to wipe over a sock which had a picture of an animal on it because wiping over the Khuff is an allowance and it is not allowed with sinning.’

[Fatawa Ibn Uthaymeen 11/116]

All Praise belongs to Allaah, may His peace and blessings be upon our final Prophet Muhammad, his family, his companions and all those who follow his way.

The Woman’s Role in Building the Successful Household By Shaikh Saleem al Hilalee

What are some of the things we can implement to build the secure home on the establishment of the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of His Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wassallam)?

1. From the most important things first of all is to learn the habits of your husband. And also it is incumbent upon the husband to learn the habits of his wife.This is something that is important as has been shown in many ahadeeth in the sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alaihi wasallam). That the muslim woman is to strive to learn about her husband as much as she can. And this can only come about by learning what our deen, our religion has dictated, in terms of how to deal with one’s husband. So therefore the important point is that she learns his habits, learns his manners and shows him how she can accommodate them with the words of Allah and the sunnah of His Messenger Muhammad (sallallahu alaihi wassallam).

2. Second, the muslim woman must realise that her responsibility in the home is a way of worshipping Allah (subhana wa ta’ala). It is part of keeping her duty to Allah. A woman once came and asked the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wassallam) while she was holding a child in her hand, she asked him: ‘Will I be rewarded for this, O messenger of Allah?’ Implying taking care of the child and raising him according to the tenants of alIslaam. And the Prophet (sallallahu alaihi wassallam) answered her in the affirmative by saying: ‘Yes you will be rewarded.’

3. Third, from the things that a muslim woman can do to build a healthy relationship in her home and cultivate it, is to know that building a peaceful home is a way of pleasing Allah (subhana wa ta’ala). It is something that Allah (subhana wa ta’ala) and his Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alaihi wassallam) advised the muslim men to seek, when they are asking for a muslim woman’s hand in marriage.

To seek out the woman who is loving, caring, tender. The muslim woman who is also ‘walood’ a source of a long lineage. So this is something that the muslim man is advised
with, to look for the woman who is caring, who is kind, who is tender. For a peaceful home must be built on tenderness and kindness and respect. So therefore these are from the things that we were advised as muslim men to seek when we are seeking a muslim wife.”
The Shaykh continued by advising us with some more hints to how to build a loving relationship in the home, by saying:

4. Number four is to try to work out the family issues and the problems that may arise inside the home, not to involve other people. Not to run to the Imaam as soon as something wrong happens, but to try to work it out inside of the home and not to let it get out of hand and also not to divulge any of the family problems in front of young children or children in the household

5. Number five, from the most important points is that he muslim woman must be patient. She must have patience. And this is vividly shown in the example as is narrated in the Saheeh of al-Bukhaari, in the story of Isma’eel and his father Ibraheem:
‘Isma’eel was married to a woman and Ibraheem came to visit his son and upon arriving to his home he found that Isma’eel was away from the house. So he asked Isma’eel’s wife, ‘how is the situation, how is your life with Isma’eel?’, without telling her that he is his father. She said ‘we have little food’ and she began to complain. He told her, ‘when your husband returns inform him that he is to change his doorstep (then entrance of his door).’ So when Isma’eel returned from his trip she informed him of what the man had told her who was in fact his father Ibraheem and Isma’eel told her: ‘Return to your family’ or ‘you are divorced, my father has just ordered me to divorce you.’

And the reason for this was that she was not patient. She showed Ibraheem that she was a woman who was not patient, was not willing to put up with some of the hardships in life.
‘Then Ibraheem came a year later and found a new wife that Isma’eel had married. And once again Isma’eel was out of the home when he arrived. Ibraheem (alaihisalaam) asked the wife of Isma’eel, his son, ‘how is your situation, how is your life?’ She said, ‘Alhumdulillah, everything is fine.’ And she did not complain. He told her, ‘when your husband returns, tell him to hold onto his doorstep and not to change it.’

Meaning that to inform Isma’eel that his wife was pious and was patient and that he should not divorce her. Therefore we see that the woman as is shown in this example, is like the doorstep of the home, everything must pass through her. She is the one is in control of what enters and what leaves. She is the one who is in control of setting the mood of the home. If she is impatient and if she is hurried in her words, therefore there will be ill treatment and hardship that will follow. But if she is patient and obedient to Allah and guarding of her home and guarding of her children, therefore it will be a situation that will have in it a healthy attitude for the husband, wife and the children.”

On The Rights Of Children In Islam And The Prohibition Of Abusing Children[Imaam Muhammad bin Saalih al-’Uthaymeen (rahimahullaah)]

Children include both sons and daughters and the rights of children are many, of the most important are education: developing the deen and good characteristics within their souls so that they have a major aspect of that instilled in them. Allaah says,
“O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones…” {at-Tahreem (66): 6}

The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wassallam) said: “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. A man is responsible for his family and his flock.” [Reported by al-Bukhaaree, Kitaab ul-Jumu’ah [Book of the Friday Prayer], Baab: al-Jumu’ah fi’l-Quraa wa’lMudun [Chapter: Praying Juma’h in Vilages and Cities] (893); Muslim, Kitaab ul-Imaarah [Book of Leadership], Baab Fadliyyat Imaam ul-’Aadil wa ’Uqoobat ul-Jaa’ir [Chapter: The Virtue of a Just Imam ad the Punishment of the Unjust One], (1827). ]

Children are a trust on the necks of the parents and the parents will both be held responsible for their children on the Day of Judgement and are responsible for their education and religious cultivation and etiquettes. The parents are to rectify their children so that they become the solace of their parents eyes in this life and the next. Allaah says,
“And those who believed and whose descendants followed them in faith – We will join with them their descendants, and We will not deprive them of anything of their deeds. Every person, for what he earned, is retained.” {at-Toor (52): 21}

The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wassallam) said: “When the son of Adam dies all of his actions end except three: some charity that he gave and from which people still benefit from; some knowledge that he left behind and the people still benefit from or a righteous child who supplicates for him.”[Reported by Muslim, Kitaab ul-Wasiyyah, Baab Ma yalahaq al-insaan min ath-Thawaab ba’d wafaatihi (1631).]

These are the fruits of cultivating children when they are given a righteous upbringing to the extent that they benefit their parents even after death. Many parents neglect this right of their children and forget them as if they as parents have no responsibility over them. They do not ask where their children have been, they do not know when they will come back in, they do not know who their friends are, they neither encourage them to do good nor forbid them from evil. What is also strange is that such parents are enthusiastic to maintain their wealth and money yet as for their children then they have no share in being maintained even though they are a priority and more beneficial to maintain in this life and the next. In the same way it is obligatory for the parent to provide food, drink and clothing to sustain the body of their child and to dress the children also.4
4-The child has a right to life. Neither the father nor the mother have the right to take the life of the child, whether a boy or a girl, by killing it or burying it alive, as was done by some Arabs of jahiliyyah. Allaah says,“And do not kill your children for fear of poverty. We provide for them and for you. Indeed, their killing is ever a great sin.” {al-Israa (17):31}

Ibn Katheer says about this verse, This Ayah indicates that Allah is more compassionate towards His servants than a father to his child, because He forbids killing children just as He enjoins parents to take care of their children in matters of inheritance. The people of Jahiliyyah would not allow their daughters to inherit from them, and some would even kill their daughters lest they make them more poor. In the Two Saheehs it is mentioned that ’Abdullaah ibn Mas’ood said ‘O Messenger of Allaah, what is the worst sin?’ The Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wassallam) responded “To ascribe divinity to someone other than Allah, when He is the One Who created you.” ‘What next?’ he was asked. “To kill your child out of fear that it will share your food”, he replied. Allaah also says,

“...When the female child who was buried alive is asked for what crime she was killed.” {at-Takweer (81): 8-9}

Ibn Katheer states in his tafseer:
Al-Maw’udah is the female infant that the people of the pre-Islamic time of ignorance would bury in the dirt due to their hatred of girls. Therefore, on the Day of Judgement, the female infant will be asked what sin she committed that caused here to be murdered. This will be a means of frightening her murderer. For verily, if the one who was wronged is questioned, what does the wrongdoer (the one who is guilty of the oppression) think then ’Ali bin Abi Talhah reported that Ibn ’Abbaas said,“...When the female child who was buried alive is asked for what crime she was killed.” {at-Takweer (81): 8-9}

“This means that she will ask.'” Abu‘d-Duha made a similar statement when he said, “She will ask, meaning she will demand restitution for her blood.” Whatever the motive for this crime may be, whether economical, such as fear of poverty and lack of provision, or fear of disgrace in the case of a daughter, Islam absolutely prohibits such a savage act which is nothing but premeditated murder and the oppression of a feeble, helpless human being. The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wassallam) took an oath of allegiance from both men and women at the time of their accepting Islam. This oath of allegiance included the condition that they would not kill their children and would consider it an absolutely prohibited crime:

“...That they will not steal nor commit zina nor kill their children...” {al-Mumtahinah (60):12}


Likewise it is obligatory to feed the heart with knowledge, eemaan and adorn the child’s soul with the clothing of taqwaa as that is good. Also from the rights of the children is to spend out on them in that which is good with neither waste nor neglect because this is obligatory for the parent to do for the children. Whoever is thankful to Allaah for the blessing on him in terms of wealth how can on prevent that wealth in his life and be stingy and miserly to his children so that after his death they hold him as being transgressive? to the extent therefore that (it is allowed) if the parent is stingy to the children in terms of what he gives them then they have the right to take what wealth will suffice them in goodness, just as how the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wassallam) ruled in regards to Hind bint ’Utbah.

From the rights of children also is that the parents to not prefer one of their children over the other in terms of spending on them. So the parents are not to give some of the children something and then neglect giving to the other children as this is transgression and oppression and Allaah does not love the oppressors. Such favoritism leads to alienating the ones who are disadvantaged and instills enmity among the children and the ones who are favoured, indeed the enmity can even be among the disadvantaged children and their parents. Some people select one of their children who is good but this is not goodness to specify one for being good, as it is not permissible to give one of the children something instead of the others for the reward of being good is from Allaah. Also specifying a child who is good by giving him things will make him be proud of himself and being good as he will see that he has some sort of virtue, this will make the other children continue in their recalcitrant behavior. Furthermore, we do not know if the one who is good may change and become evil while the recalcitrant one may change and become good, because the hearts are within the Hand of Allaah and he turns them how He wills. In the Two Saheehs from an-Nu’maan bin Basheer (radi Allaahu ’anhu) that his father Basheer bin Sa’d took him to Allaah’s Messenger (sallallaahu ’alayhi wassallam) and said, “I have given this son of mine a slave.” The Prophet (sallallaahu ’alayhi wassallam) asked, “Have you given all your sons the same?”

Basheer replied in the negative. The Prophet said, “Take back your gift then.”[Reported by al-Bukhaaree, Kitaab ul-Hibbah [The Book of Giving Gifts], Baab ul-Hibbat li’l-Walad [Chapter: Giving Gifts to Children] (2587); Muslim, Kitaab ul-Hibaat [The Book of Gifts], Baab Karaahiyyat Tafdeel Ba’dh ilAwlaad fi’l-Hibbah [Chapter: The Dislike of Favouring Some Children Over Others When Giving Gifts], vol.9, p.1623] (is the addition): “Fear Allaah and be just between your children!”[ Reported by al-Bukhaaree, Kitaab ul-Hibbah [The Book of Gifts], Baab ul-Ishaad fi’l-Hibbah [Chapter: Testifying When Giving Gifts] (2587); Muslim, Kitaab ul-Hibaat [The Book of Gifts], Baab Karaahiyyat Tafdeel Ba’dh ilAwlaad fi’l-Hibbah [Chapter: The Dislike of Favouring Some Children Over Others When Giving Gifts], vol.14, p.1623] And in another narration In another wording of the hadeeth (is the addition): “…Seek the testimony of another person, other than me. I will not testify to an act of injustice.”[ Reported by al-Bukhaaree, Kitaab ush-Shahaadaat [The Book of Witnesses], Baab la yashad ’ala Shahaadat Jawr idha Ashad [Chapter: There is no Testifying for an Oppressive Witnesses When They request Witnesses] (2650); Muslim, vol.14, p.1623.]So the Messenger of Allaah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wassallam) named favouring some children over others as being injustice and injustice is oppression and haraam. However, if a parent gives one of his children something that he needs which the second child does not need, like if one of the children needs some stationary equipment or medicine or to get married then there is no problem in specifying that for a particular child or children if they are in need of that because this specification is due to the need and is like maintenance of them.

Whenever a parent establishes that which is obligatory on him for the child in terms of education and maintenance the child has to also show goodness to his parent and safeguards their rights. Whenever the parent neglects what is obligatory on him/her then that is worthy of being punished with a child who has his rights disregarded and then is tested with bad behavior as a reward towards his parents. As you treat others you will be treated.

Kind Treatment of wives[Sahih Bukhari]

Narrated `Aisha: Eleven women sat (at a place) and promised and contracted that they would not conceal anything of the news of their husbands.

The first one said, “My husband is like the meat of a slim weak camel which is kept on the top of a mountain which is neither easy to climb, nor is the meat fat, so that one might put up with the trouble of fetching it.”

The second one said, “I shall not relate my husband’s news, for I fear that I may not be able to finish his story, for if I describe him, I will mention all his defects and bad traits.”

The third one said, “My husband, the “too-tall”! if I describe him (and he hears of that) he will divorce me, and if I keep quiet, he will keep me hanging (neither divorcing me nor treating me as a wife).”

The fourth one said, “My husband is (moderate in temper) like the night of Tihama: neither hot nor cold; I am neither afraid of him, nor am I discontented with him.”

The fifth one said, “My husband, when entering (the house) is a leopard (sleeps a lot), and when going out, is a lion (boasts a lot). He does not ask about whatever is in the house.”

The sixth one said, “If my husband eats, he eats too much (leaving the dishes empty), and if he drinks he leaves nothing; if he sleeps he sleeps he rolls himself (alone in our blankets); and he does not insert his palm to inquire about my feelings.”

The seventh one said, “My husband is a wrong-doer or weak and foolish. All the defects are present in him. He may injure your head or your body or may do both.”

The eighth one said, “My husband is soft to touch like a rabbit and smells like a Zarnab (a kind of good smelling grass).”

The ninth one said, “My husband is a tall generous man wearing a long strap for carrying his sword. His ashes are abundant (i.e. generous to his guests) and his house is near to the people (who would easily consult him).”

The tenth one said, “My husband is Malik (possessor), and what is Malik? Malik is greater than whatever I say about him. (He is beyond and above all praises which can come to my mind). Most of his camels are kept at home (ready to be slaughtered for the guests) and only a few are taken to the pastures. When the camels hear the sound of the lute (or the tambourine) they realize that they are going to be slaughtered for the guests.”

The eleventh one said, “My husband is Abu Zar’ah and what is Abu Zar’ah (i.e. what should I say about him)? He has given me many ornaments and my ears are heavily loaded with them and my arms have become fat (i.e. I have become fat). And he has pleased me, and I have become so happy that I feel proud of myself. He found me with my family who were mere owners of sheep and living in poverty, and brought me to a respected family having horses and camels and threshing and purifying grain. Whatever I say, he does not rebuke or insult me. When I sleep, I sleep till late in the morning, and when I drink water (or milk), I drink my fill. The mother of Abu Zar’ah and what may one say in praise of the mother of Abu Zar’ah? Her saddle bags were always full of provision and her house was spacious. As for the son of Abu Zar’ah, what may one say of the son of Abu Zar’ah? His bed is as narrow as an unsheathed sword and an arm of a kid (of four months) satisfies his hunger. As for the daughter of Abu Zar’ah, she is obedient to her father and to her mother. She has a fat well-built body and that arouses the jealousy of her husband’s other wife. As for the (maid) slave girl of Abu Zar’ah, what may one say of the (maid) slave girl of Abu Zar’ah? She does not uncover our secrets but keeps them, and does not waste our provisions and does not leave the rubbish scattered everywhere in our house.” The eleventh lady added, “One day it so happened that Abu Zar’ah went out at the time when the milk was being milked from the animals, and he saw a woman who had two sons like two leopards playing with her two breasts. (On seeing her) he divorced me and married her. Thereafter I married a noble man who used to ride a fast tireless horse and keep a spear in his hand. He gave me many things, and also a pair of every kind of livestock and said, Eat (of this), O Um Zar’ah, and give provision to your relatives.” She added, “Yet, all those things which my second husband gave me could not fill the smallest utensil of Abu Zar’ah’s.” `Aisha then said: Allah’s Messenger (sallal-laahu-alayhi-wasallam) said to me, “I am to you as Abu Zar’ah was to his wife Umm Zar’ah.”

[Source: Saheeh Al-Bukhaari’ Hadeeth Number 518. Vol 7. Darussalam Print]

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